Work

Ruh-roh, everyone watch out, I'm writing about work! Soon I will be fired!

Not really. All I'm going to say about work is that it is totally cool being someone's assistant because, here's why, I get the exact right amount of email. I am not a Boss Person who gets obscene quantities of email and has to do very arduous things in order to deal with all of their email, and I am not a, I don't know, receptionist person who doesn't get any email at all (I have never been a receptionist, so I don't know how much email they get actually), but instead I get just the perfect amount.

My motto, of course, is moderation in all things. Too much of something can be overwhelming, like when you are enjoying driving with your window down and then you go faster and there is far too much wind and it gets all in your hair and makes a tremendous mess of whatever thing you have taken pains to do to your hair that day. And too little is depressing and it leaves you sort of forlorn, like when they sing the Hallelujah bit in Mass and the vowels are so much fun and then all too soon they stop singing and you're all like hey, I was still into the Hallelujahs, DON'T START UP WITH THAT WORD ACCORDING TO MATTHEW BUSINESS, which, believe me, is a losing battle, because they will carry on with the word according to Matthew no matter how many subtle signs you give them that you would prefer to carry on singing Hallelujahs.

Anyway, the best email thing is when I get to arrange meetings. Then it's a veritable email extravaganza (but within carefully delineated boundaries, so that it doesn't become too much). Iemail people about the meetings, and then everyone emails me back, but their emails are easily dealt with and then I can return to whatever else I have to do. And everyone is pleased! I swear! All I have to do in order to ensure that everyone is pleased is send a bunch of emails! Which I love doing, and I especially love it when I am in the middle of something and suddenly! suddenly! up pops a little Outlook window in order to say that someone has emailed me, and then I get to take a short break from my current task (because enthralling though my tasks invariably are, one needs a break from everything occasionally, even very pleasant things like a steady diet of hashbrowns and Oreos; cf. above business about moderation) and sort out arranging the meeting.

I had a list of a bunch of other things (I mean, at least two) that I wanted to remark upon, but I left it at work. Oh well. There was something to do with chasms, I think. Or holes. Something that gave me a mental image of the cover of the movie Holes, though I guess that could have been anything really.