You know what they call the school of library science? SLIS. Sliss. Say it. Hiss on the S sounds.
Doesn't it sound dirty? Like, quite, quite dirty?
Want to know what it sounds like to me, exactly? It sounds like a sex organ. An alien sex organ, the kind humans don't have. It sounds to me like some writer of dirty science fiction who made up a really sexy humanoid alien. So there's this alien, and she's all sexy and she's putting the moves on the innocent human guy who's just come to colonize the new planet, and you know, she's a sexy alien, he's helpless in the face of her seductive wiles, so they're all making out and whatever and he's like HOLY SHIT WHAT IS THAT? and she's like, Mm, baby, that's my sliss
I had to stop right there because I was laughing so hard I started to cry and my eyes filled up with tears.
It just happened again. Every time I think about the word sliss I start laughing.
Sorry. Sliss. It just sounds funny. Anyway she's all Mm, baby, that's my sliss, yeah, that's it and they really go to town with the sliss. It sounds to me like the kind of sex organ that would distend. Thoughts? What does the sliss do? Distend, engorge, harden, lubricate?
(Edit to add: Quiver?)
This is no good. I have to stop. Sliss, sliss, sliss. (Hi, tim - are you busy thinking Jenny's such an idiot, I'm not going to finish reading this.) But I can't stop! You know why I can't stop? I can't stop because THIS IS MY SCHOOL and I am in it for TWO YEARS and every time somebody says SLIS (sliss!), I'm going to start laughing until I cry because it sounds so very, very dirty!
Incidentally, this was our orientation day today, and everyone kept saying SLIS, all day long, and at one point I leaned over to the girl next to me and I said, "Heehee, sliss. Sounds dirty, doesn't it?" She laughed nervously, and then a while later she went to the bathroom, and when she came back from the bathroom? She sat somewhere else. Not next to me, the dirty-minded girl with nothing but sliss on the brain.
7 comments:
A friend of mine who spent part of the summer in Borneo has been telling me disgusting stories about leeches, and actually Sliss just sounds like the name of a leech to me. Like, replace the innocent human and the sexy alien on the new planet with a bunch of leeches wriggling around hoping to find food, and get rid of all the sex, and one of them is named Sliss. Blech.
So yes, dirty, but not sex-dirty.
You could also pronounce it like 'skis', so that it would become 'sleaze'.
*helpful*
Yes, but they don't say sleaze. They say sliss. They say it and say it. Nonstop.
I agree with Jenny, it sound just like an alien sex organ. Possibly something humanoid with a lizardy component?
Okay, here's the thing. You're thinking too humanly. The sliss glows, and turns a whole rainbow of colors as she gets more into it; when it becomes deepest indigo, it explodes into a lot of gaudy fireworks, and while her human is dazed and confused and coughing from the smoke, she steals his high-tech weaponry and escapes.
Meantime her boyfriend is watching all this on a monitor and laughing his ass off. (Sexual jealousy is considered ridiculously primitive by aliens. Love, however, is highly regarded, and when the human dude falls in love with Fireworks Girl, he and the boyfriend bond and become best buddies.)
The end. *bows*
Oh my God Mom, you're a genius! I don't know where that all came from, but I feel you are entirely correct. tim, my beloved, I feel you are entirely wrong, but I still love you.
Wow. I'm so outnumbered. Alien sex organ it is.
> when it becomes deepest indigo
Jenny, is this support for or discouragement from naming your child Indigo?
Support. Of course.
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