Disclaimer: This really isn't to say that I don't love, love, love England. I completely do. I miss it terribly, darling England, darling England and its lovely public transportation systems and its beautiful daffodils (Wordsworth was not interesting but he had a point) and its yummy pasties and its London, London, London, London, London, and my uni and my flat and my lovely flatmates. All of these things I missed.
But, in spite of the truce I declared with English rain, I was never entirely reconciled to the loss of the magnificent thunderstorms that England never had (but I was only there for nine months and I was only in one spot of England and I'm sure that elsewhere they have massive thunderstorms but I never saw any, that's all). I am a sucker for extravagant weather. Today when I was walking through the quad I felt exactly like Dorothy trying to get back to the farm in the middle of the tornado. Except rainier. It was so great. I mean, okay, I was really cold, and I was absolutely drenched, but it was so cool. The wind was tremendous, and the rain was coming down in sheets, and it was very, very, very amazing.
The lady at the cafeteria today said "Louisiana sure knows how to do rain". Damn straight. (She was nice and offered me a plastic bag to shield myself from the rain, but it was way beyond the point where that would be helpful in any non-psychological way.)
The only thing, though, the only thing about these humongous thunderstorms that are so very amazingly wondrous (apart from the fact that sometimes in the autumn they are hurricanes) is that they always show up on a Tuesday, my free day for watching Guiding Light. And then the weather people want to be all "Let's interrupt the show (never the commercials) to tell you a really long bunch of information about the weather in towns where you don't live". I mean, one second Beth is screaming in agony and the next second we're being given a tornado watch for a parish in which we do not reside.
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Beth? What's wrong with Beth? She CAN'T be having another baby, can she? She must be pushing sixty!
Yes, Beth just had a baby. It was a home birth; she kept assuring Alan there was no time for an ambulance, so he didn't bother to call one. Instead he got Jonathan (who up until that point was pointing a gun in his face and threatening to kill him) to come help him birth the infant. Alan thought it would make him and Jonathan BFF but it didn't so much, although it did convince Jonathan that it would be more fun to let Alan live and suffer than to shoot him in the face.
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