Dave is laid-back, fancies himself good at Shithead (a card game we play a lot involving much cursing but no slapping of cards, which I think takes a lot of the fun away), and has a bottle of Ouzo (observe shot glass in hand) that he shares liberally and mostly with Edward.
Edward is the youngest in our flat, has a shot of Dave’s Ouzo in his hand, and believes that AIDS was manufactured by the American government to get rid of the gays. Ebola also. I explained to him that it was not so, but he clearly thought I was simply taken in by my government.
Elliott insisted on being photographed with his, er, beer goggles, is not very good at teaching people to play Shithead, and is very interested in muscles (where they are and what they’re called).
Flick is studying languages and is totally crazy about them (quite rightly!), and her real name, Felicity, led to her being called Toilet as a schoolgirl because Felicity-Facility-Toilet, which is much more inventive than any of my classmates ever got.
Holly is studying law and I didn’t understand her the first three times she said that to me because I kept translating what she was saying into “Lor” and being bewildered.
Iva is one of two Lithuanian guys in my flat. He likes to pretend he is chewing tobacco and say “Howdy” in his level Lithuanian best at a Texan accent. One time when he and Vyga were about to have vodka shots, he said, “To Texas, our favorite state!” and Vyga said, “What is it that they say?” and Iva explained that it was “Howdy pardner” and then they both said that and drank their vodka shots and I nearly fell off my chair laughing.
I am me, and you have never seen me in a skirt that short before. It’s Sarah’s, and she made me.
Kieran looks like a leprechaun and plays drums in a band and has had his hair straightened by Sarah and/or Trish.
Memo (oh, dear, is that how he spells it? I swear that’s what it sounds like he’s saying) is of Turkish extraction but has been in the UK for at least a year, studying at the University of Manchester, from which he has transferred for his second and third year. He is usually very quiet but had an extremely loud and rejoiceful birthday yesterday (observe shot glasses).
Noriko (left) and Mai (right) are from Tokyo, and I think they are on exchange. They do not spend a lot of time hanging out with the rest of the flatmates, but they are terribly nice, and Mai is majoring in English literature! Like me! They also do cute drawings on their kitchen things, as seen below.
See? There is Noriko, and there is Mai, and there is happy toast.
Sarah very generously lent me all her clothes so that I would have a proper English school uniform to wear. She thinks she might do directing and tries to eat the gravy left over on her plate with a fork, to limited success.
Trish has a large family and feels very strongly about mashed potatoes (they are very delicious and should be consumed as often as possible, and it is little short of criminal to leave mash on your plate).
Vyga is the other Lithuanian guy, and he is very good at hauling drunk people around, and he does not like the Poles but was vague as to why. He is not going to drink all of that.
P.S. My flatmates do not normally dress funny and draw freckles on themselves and drink vodka shots at random. There was a school disco which meant everyone had to dress up, and yesterday it was school uniform night. (Actually, I found out later and to my intense chagrin, it was skool uniform night.) Like a wild woman I had a vodka lemonade, which is exactly like Sprite, but I did not dance because I do not like to. Instead I went home earlyish and was thus treated to the sight of an astoundingly drunk Memo. Luckily the Lithuanians handled up on it. Lucky for him, I mean, because I would have just let him fall asleep on the narrow bench in the kitchen. Actions have consequences. I am pitiless.
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